There are two types of ex-lovers – those you don’t want to hear and see ever again and those who still have a place in your heart. You should permanently eliminate the first ones from your life because there is probably a reason why they are ‘personas non grata.’. And the second type of exes may deserve a second chance, especially if you split up in peace and without harsh words.
The period right after the breakup can be harrowing. You think about the causes of it but also about the possibility of reconciliation. Although you probably broke with the reason, at one point, you wanted everything to be as it used to be. Yet, thinking about getting back together is one thing, and real reconciliation is something completely different.
As seen on Get Ex Back For Good, it’s feasible to reconcile with your ex-lover. But it’s not always desirable. Still, some people do deserve one more chance. That’s why you should consider a few things before making a final decision on starting your relationship all over again.
You Still Have Feelings
After a breakup, the emotions don’t go away overnight. You were with your ex for a while and created a deep emotional bond. You know each other very well, and your relationship was all rainbows and butterflies to some point. But at some point, one of you wanted to take a break, so you split up.
People after a breakup often lack that sense of connection and closeness. That’s not always influenced by the length of the relationship but by quality. You may have been together for only a few months, but you have realized that you were soulmates. And you think the same even after a breakup.
That’s why you can still feel a strong desire to hug your ex-partner, talk to them, fall asleep together, etc. Couples that still feel emotionally attached to their exes have great chances of successful reconciliation. But you have to be sure that your partner isn’t completely over you. Of course, you should share the same feelings.
You Both Matured
Before winning your ex back, you should first figure out what was wrong with your relationship. The immaturity of one or both partners might be the reason for a breakup. Maybe you were jealous, reckless, or negligent toward your lover because you were too young. This behavior is typical of young adults but not permanent. People mature with age and change, mostly for the better.
The most important step is to accept that your relationship ended because of your lack of maturity. After a while, you two are older and with more life experience. You now look at things from a different perspective and see where you have sinned. If the other party does the same, maybe you should try again.
You Had Great Time Together
You should also look at your relationship from a holistic point of view. Maybe you really had some great time together, but something wasn’t quite right. Sometimes people devote themselves to partners, ignoring anything else. That can be destructive for their relationship.
If you had some time apart to get a new look into your relationship, you could realize what went wrong and what has to be changed. You can still have a great time together again, but you have to balance it with the rest of your life. If you’re willing to reconcile but not lose yourself, go for it.
On the link below, check some tips on not losing yourself in a relationship:
https://www.huffpost.com/entry/dating-advice-how-not-to-lose-yourself_b_1701314
You Broke up Peacefully
The way you broke up is of great importance for making a reconciliation decision. Suppose you ended your relationship over text or followed by fights, yelling, aggressive outbursts, and insults. In that case, there’s no need to think about reconciliation. Even though your relationship was good, it is unlikely that it will be again after such excesses.
But suppose you ended the relationship after a calm conversation. That says a lot about your mutual love and respect. It’s a good way to end something wrong without bad blood. But it could also mean you’re not putting a full stop after the breakup, but a comma. The more civilized your separation was, the greater the chances of reconciliation.
You’re Ready to Change
Relationships are all about making compromises, but in such a way that both partners are happy, satisfied, and fulfilled. It’s important to consider the reasons for the breakup and bring a mutual decision of reconciling. Before that, make sure both of you have the same expectations.
First of all, you need to make sure that you are both willing to change. You need to be honest about things that bothered you, but also to accept your partner’s suggestions about something that bothered them. When you can understand each other’s needs, you’ll be in a better position to make a wise decision.
After being completely open, don’t waste your time thinking about the past anymore. Focus on the further course of action. That will ensure that the two of you can have a good time reuniting. On this source, find out a scientific explanation for reconciliation.
You can’t be in an ‘on-off’ relationship. After breaking up, you and your ex-partner need to make sure that you can work through the problems you had. Taking your time to consider these things will make it easier for you to make a crucial decision on reconciliation. And don’t worry if you can’t. There is always a good time to start over.